Domestic abuse: How to protect yourself and your children
Domestic abuse is a crime that is largely hidden behind closed doors and as such is not reported or noticed as often as it should. It can be in many forms, though the common perception is that there is violence involved. Women and children are commonly victims of this crime, although men can be victims too. If you have been wrongly accused of domestic violence, contact a good domestic abuse defense attorney. They can protect you.
Getting out of an abusive relationship can feel impossible, but there are options and things to consider if you feel trapped and alone.
What do statistics say about domestic abuse in the UK?
When it comes to the makeup of domestic abuse victims, studies show that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men will experience this. This is a significant proportion of the UK population.
It is estimated by the Crime Survey for England and Wales that there are roughly 2,214,000 victims, but only just shy of 900,000 were recorded by police in the year ending March 2023. This indicates just how unreported this crime is, for several different reasons.
As well as adult victims, children do not escape abusive relationships unscathed. It is thought that 1 in 5 children have lived with someone who is committing abuse. They are often physically harmed as well as emotionally harmed by observing the violence.
What is domestic abuse and what are the signs?
Domestic abuse is defined as a pattern of abusive behaviour towards an intimate partner or family member. One of the defining features is that the abuser exerts some sort of power or control over their victim.
The most common perception of domestic abuse is violence. Whilst this is a common form of domestic abuse, it is not the only one. Domestic abuse can also come under the forms of sexual abuse, violent or threatening behaviour, controlling behaviour economic abuse and emotional abuse.
Many of these types of abuse may not be visible from an outsider’s perspective. If you suspect someone may be in an abusive relationship, there are things you can look out for. You may notice mean behaviour by their partner in public, or that they have become socially withdrawn. Making excuses for someone else’s behaviour is also common, as victims often try to deflect suspicion through guilt or shame.
What should you do when facing domestic abuse?
If you are in a domestically abusive relationship, there are ways that you can get help safely.
- Protect yourself online
If you are seeking to leave and are looking up charities online, remember to cover your tracks. Get into the habit of clearing your computer and phone browser history, especially if your abuser has a habit of checking your phone. - Seek legal advice
Leaving an abusive relationship can be financially challenging, especially if you have been a victim of financial control. Find a trustworthy family lawyer who specialises in family law. They can help to protect you and your children financially and legally once you have left. This may involve filing legal motions in court regarding custody, divorce and financial agreements. - Find a refuge
If you are in immediate danger, gather your essential belongings such as passports, medications and chargers and find shelter at a women’s refuge. These safe spaces are full of people who can help you start a new life. Once you are there, consider contacting the police to enforce your separation from your partner.
Domestic abuse is never the victim’s fault, and it may take many attempts before you feel ready to leave.
